50+ Fearless Feminine Power

The Silent Killer of Dreams

Do you have the courage to live your best life? If you want to live your life fully you have to become friends with courage. In my humble opinion, one of the most courageous things that you can do is to peel away the layers of who you are not in order to discover who you really are from your deepest core. Society has such a huge impact on the way that we think that often we have beliefs that are not aligned with our truest spirit, and yet we take them as truths. Unfortunately, these beliefs may not be serving your highest good. In fact, they may be sabotaging whatever it is that you really want to create in your life and you may not even be aware of the impact. These beliefs can be the silent killer of dreams. It takes enormous courage to challenge the beliefs that society would have you accept. One of the significant ways that I help my clients is by defying these stories (aka beliefs) that they have about themselves. These stories are often created subconsciously and are more about the outside world and its influence on their life choices, than their inside world which is where true inner wisdom lies. As a coach, I find it incredibly rewarding when I see the light bulb go on in a client who was previously defining herself through the lens of others and now is defined by her truest self. That aha is the catalyst where true transformation takes place and once a client sees this, she will never be quite the same. In...

Creating Your Life With Your Whole Heart

The older that I get the more important I believe that it is to live my life full out because even if I am lucky enough to live another 40 years (yup-that would make me 99) I realize how much more precious my time is here on Earth. And I don’t want to squander it by playing small anymore. Been there, done that and it is borrrring!!! I would much rather embrace life, take chances, enjoy the journey, let go of attachment to the outcome, express my unique spirit in the world, stand in my power, share the best parts of me. What about you? Do you feel that way? I was just listening to an interview with Brene Brown and she touched on this very subject. She calls it living with whole heartedness and she talks about the opposite of this which is living with half heartedness: Half heartedness is when you say to yourself “I won’t put my whole heart into something and I will hedge my bets, so that if I fail I won’t be as hurt”. Brene Brown This of course, is not true. It is fear based thinking-allowing our fear to determine our destiny. It is the stuff that regrets are made of. It also makes us feel as though we somehow robbed ourselves of our own magnificence because we will always wonder…… “What if I would have put my whole heart and soul into something. What might have been? Who might I have become?” Fear of failure is a passion killer and it stops us from owning our magnificence. Of course no one likes...

Are You a Waffler?

One who waffles, from the verb waffle, meaning to never settle on a stance on one (or more) issue(s); A waffler usually goes from one side to the other and back again, usually multiple times, depending on who (s)he is talking to at the time. -Urban Dictionary A dear friend of mine has amazing design instincts and yet she is currently stuck in “I don’t know land” about a paint color for her kitchen. It has been going on for quite some time. She currently has a gorgeous hand painted mural of a garden scene that is timeless but the walls abutting it are a dated faux finish so she wants to change them to a solid colored paint and she is torturing herself over what color to pick. Should she go with the gray lavender that is in walls in the hall adjoining for a subtle consistent flow or a pear color that is in the bird in the mural for a pop of color and fun? She asked me my opinion on the colors she was thinking of and I told her what I thought. My background is in art and design so it made sense to consult with me on this. She has also asked the opinion of numerous others which has caused her to waffle. Basically I let her know that none of her choices were wrong-she has a great eye- but each choice would give her a different feeling and she had to choose which feeling she wanted. That is where she has to make the decision. This is where the “rubber meets the road”...

One Life-A Letter to Myself

“Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once we grow up”. “It took me four years to paint like Raphael, but a lifetime to paint like a child.” Pablo Picasso The older I get the more I want to create my life intentionally. It has become my mission to have reverence for my time left, whatever that may be, to embrace life. This is my journey and I get to decide what it looks like. And I want to take other women on this ride, or I should say on their own authentic ride. I want to help them see that anything is possible and it is never too late to create what they want. What about you? What do you want your precious life to look like? What would make your heart sing? One of the things that I know for sure is that I want my daughters to see a woman aging with joy for life, someone who embraces every moment and carves a path for other women to celebrate themselves. I want to model a new kind of ageism-one that celebrates the mature woman. I am laughing as I say “mature woman” because there is that part of me who still feels like a kid and frankly, I never want to lose that childlike wonder. As I celebrate my parents 60th wedding anniversary in Campden Maine with my whole family I am reminded that we can learn so much from children. Holding my niece’s baby today, I watched him explore my hand with fascination. Time stood still as I watched...

Fearful or Fabulous-You Choose

Are you settling for less than a thrilling life? Do you play small and safe instead of big and bold? What one thing would you like to change in your life for the better? When we want something to change in our lives, we are typically more motivated when we are running away from pain as opposed to reaching towards the promise of something better-something more fabulous! This is why we often see people make big changes when they hit “rock bottom”. They are in so much pain that it becomes too difficult to stay in the status quo and so they will try anything to get out of this pain. However there is another way of manifesting what you want in your life that comes from creating with a sense of inspiration and purpose as you move towards something better as opposed to moving away from something painful. And this is the kind of manifestation that sets the most successful people apart from the rest and allows them to grow and stretch and push boundaries of what is possible. Real transformation happens in our lives when we move from a position of fear and pain to power and abundance. When I talk about power, I am not referring to egoic power but an innate knowing that you can create something and handle whatever comes your way during the process. It is the power that is inspired by what is possible as opposed to what is safe. Standing in your power is a state of “being”. It is your core strength that stays sure and centered through all of...

Stuck in A Dead End Job That You Hate?

I was following an interesting thread on a group on Linked In that started with: Why do women let fear drive them into staying with a job they hate instead of starting that business that they love? I was interested because one of the things I do in my coaching practice is help Baby Boomer Women conquer fear and limiting beliefs so that they can create the life they truly want and this seems to be a recurring theme. Many of the comments that I hear are the same when it comes to fear of leaving a job to pursue something better and this was corroborated by this thread. Fear can paralyze us and prevent us from creating something much better in our lives if we let it. My job is to help people manage their fear so that they can create their most amazing life. Here are 5 Top Fears that keep women at a job they hate and their antidote:                                                       False                                                       Evidence                                                       Appearing                                              ...